This Too Shall Pass, Right?

 




Tonight is one of those nights where my work life morphed directly into my home life. There were some (students') tears at work and now I just finished dealing with tears at home.  My daughter is now laying with a pillow and blankets on the floor next to the computer I am using while I am typing this blog post.

 This is allowing my husband to focus on reading Harry to sleep. Harry's exhausted after a long school day and his final cross country meet of the season. Instead of crying, Lilly is now happily "reading" some picture books. It is much easier to tune out her precious story telling than her piercing cries. 

If I am ever asked in the future how I managed to balance, a full time job, being a mom and taking classes - I'll have to be honest in my reflections and say bluntly, "I didn't. Don't do as I did."

This is rough. I nearly feel teary, too. I wish I had it all together. But I feel like I am missing something in our class as I feel like there are numerous assignments I have no idea how to complete. It feels like it is (past) time to ask for help!

Good night Everyone.


 


Comments

  1. kateOctober 13, 2022 at 5:50 AM

    Colleen, I echo everything you are feeling here. I am overwhelmed and just can't keep up. Every time I turn around it feels like things/assignments have multiplied (I can mentally, emotionally, and physically handle about two course tasks per week right now). If you could see my clean laundry pile tossed in the basement (and from which we desperately try to find all the pieces we need each morning), and the dirty laundry pile sitting idly next to the machine on the floor waiting to be remembered only be forgotten for a day or two once it actually makes its way into the machine, you would feel validated and supported in all your feelings.

    "Hang in there" is such a crappy sentiment for this. So, I will offer instead, I relate and am here any time you need confirmation that everything you are feeling is valid.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ms. JordynOctober 15, 2022 at 8:58 AM

    Colleen, I feel like we have all had a very hard week and feel defeated. My apartment is a mess, I feel like I am being judged at work for not doing enough when I feel like I am doing too much. Sometimes it's all just too much for us as teachers and as humans. I hope that, for everyone, this weekend is almost like a reset button and we can all go into work Monday refreshed.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ms. KOctober 15, 2022 at 6:12 PM

    Hi Colleen,

    You are certainly not alone! I feel every word of your post and feel as though I am unable to keep up with the assignments and classwork expectations as I should. It is certainly not too late to ask for help! Sometimes, it is ok to just stop for a moment, be late with an assignment (if that means you'll be ready to push forward with more down the road) and take care of YOU. Keep in mind that although it may seem daunting and exhausting, it will all be worth it in the end. The most important thing is to prioritize and don't stress. Keep your head up and reach out to your instructor. They will be happy to help!
    Best, ~Tina

    ReplyDelete
  4. Tate Van ValkenburgOctober 16, 2022 at 6:09 AM

    Colleen, I can feel your defeat and I'm sending you strength! Though I don't have kids of my own, during the spring semester I was taking 2 classes, working full time, and had 2 other part time jobs (thanks to being paid so little in education). It was too much and I found myself in tears almost every night, I think I was just floating through time. Taking classes right now is...a lot, and I can;t imagine the pressure you must feel on top of being a mother, but I can understand the feeling of overwhelming stress. But know that you are doing a great job and you will become an amazing teacher in the future, your hard work doesn't go unnoticed!
    Tate

    ReplyDelete

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